Frank Sinatra Parody
Wartime President
US Marine Corps
The Teddy Bear Collection
Guaranteed Weight Loss
Driving Test
When Not to Hyphenate
Kitchen Train
Sexual Harrassment
American Democracy
Obey the Panties
political humor
Democrats are Sexy
Why Bush Won the Election
Ten Ways Dick Cheney Can Kill You
George Bush Sign
Bill Clinton Sign
Republican vs. Democrat Women
The Ambiguously Gay Duo
The Assuming song
The Man Song
The Woman Song
Elvis Parody
The Yogi Bear song
Cat in the Kettle
Michael Jackson Parody
Pimp vs Karate Trainer
Einstein the Parrot
The Lion Sleeps Tonite
Indecent Proposal
Holdng Your Own
Boobs Magazine
Karaoke for the Deaf
PS3 vs Wii
The Lion Sleeps Tonite
battle of the sexes
Drink Choices
The Perfect Man
Male Stages of Life
Female Stages of Life
Advice for the Young Bride
Automatic Tampon Remover
Sign Story
geek zone
Them Devil Computers
Microsoft Visual Studio 2005 Error
Proof that 1+1=2
Web Development Time Breakdown
Microsoft Nerd Ad
Hell Froze Over
Level 1 Human
Customs Dogs
Halloween Dogs
Halloween Cats
Florida Bird Flu
Parrot Jokes
funny pictures
Google Maps
Middle East Map
Letters to God
Coppertone Girl Redux
The World According to America
Osama's New Look
New Navy Program
Italian vs American
TV Hostesses
South Park Memo
Newspaper Clippings
Celebrity Mugshots
Celeb's Lost Pictures
Celebs as Kids
Celebs without Makeup
Send Cards Please
Aunt Judy
The New Car
NASA Chicken Test
Ebonics Language Lesson
College Admissions Essay
Baghdad Bob Quotes
Old-Time Religion
The Tricky Professor
World's Most
Useless Webpage
Ellen Feiss
Apple Ad Spoofs
Famous Last Words
Camel Toads
Bush's Dog
The Cop and the Navy Chief
Little Johnny


Bush Base
Harm America
Volunteer Army
Poor People
Pie Higher
"The point now is how do we work together to achieve important goals. And one such goal is a democracy in Germany."
-Washington, D.C., May 5, 2006

"That's George Washington, the first president, of course. The interesting thing about him is that I read three-three or four books about him last year. Isn't that interesting?"
-Washington, D.C., May 5, 2006

"I aim to be a competitive nation."
-San Jose, Calif., April 21, 2006

"If the Iranians were to have a nuclear weapon they could proliferate."
-Washington D.C., March 21, 2006

"We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job. That's what I'm telling you."
-Gulfport, Miss., Sept. 20, 2005

"Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house-he's lost his entire house-there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch."
-Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005

"So please give cash money to organizations that are directly involved in helping save lives-save the life who had been affected by Hurricane Katrina."
-Washington D.C., Sept. 6, 2005

"You see, not only did the attacks help accelerate a recession, the attacks reminded us that we are at war."
-Washington, D.C., June 8, 2005

"Well, we've made the decision to defeat the terrorists abroad so we don't have to face them here at home. And when you engage the terrorists abroad, it causes activity and action."
-Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005

"If they pre-decease or die early, there's an asset base to be able to pass on to a loved one."
-On Social Security money stored in private accounts, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, March 30, 2005

"We need to apply 21st-century information technology to the health care field. We need to have our medical records put on the I.T."
-Collinsville, Ill., Jan. 5, 2005

"The CIA laid out several scenarios and said life could be lousy, life could be OK, life could be better, and they were just guessing as to what the conditions might be like."
-New York, Sept. 21, 2004

"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN's aren't able to practice their love with women all across the country."
-Sept. 6, 2004, Poplar Bluff, Mo

"We rank 10th amongst the industrialized world in broadband technology and its availability. That's not good enough for America. Tenth is 10 spots too low as far as I'm concerned."
-Minneapolis, Minn., April 26, 2004

"King Abdullah of Jordan, the King of Morocco, I mean, there's a series of places-Qatar, Oman-I mean, places that are developing-Bahrain-they're all developing the habits of free societies."
-Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004

"In my judgment, when the United States says there will be serious consequences, and if there isn't serious consequences, it creates adverse consequences."

"I'm the master of low expectations."
-Aboard Air Force One, June 4, 2003

"See, we love-we love freedom. That's what they didn't understand. They hate things; we love things. They act out of hatred; we don't seek revenge, we seek justice out of love."
-Oklahoma City, Aug. 29, 2002

"I can assure you that, even though I won't be sitting through every single moment of the seminars, nor will the vice president, we will look at the summaries."

"Over 75 percent of white Americans own their home, and less than 50 percent of Hispanos and African Americans don't own their home. And that's a gap, that's a homeownership gap. And we've got to do something about it."
-Cleveland, Ohio, July 1, 2002

"Do you have blacks, too?"
-To Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001

"The suicide bombings have increased. There's too many of them."
-Albuquerque, N.M., Aug. 15, 2001

"Anyway, I'm so thankful, and so gracious-I'm gracious that my brother Jeb is concerned about the hemisphere as well."
-Miami, Fla., June 4, 2001

"I've coined new words, like, misunderstanding and Hispanically."
-Radio-Television Correspondents Association dinner, Washington, D.C., March 29, 2001

"A lot of times in the rhetoric, people forget the facts. And the facts are that thousands of small businesses-Hispanically owned or otherwise-pay taxes at the highest marginal rate."
-to the Hispanic Chamber of Commerce; Washington, D.C., March 19, 2001

"I think there is some methodology in my travels."
-Washington, D.C., March 5, 2001

"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test."
-Townsend, Tenn., Feb. 21, 2001

"We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House-make no mistake about it."
-Washington, D.C., Feb. 7, 2001

"My pro-life position is I believe there's life. It's not necessarily based in religion. I think there's a life there, therefore the notion of life, liberty and pursuit of happiness."
-Quoted in the San Francisco Chronicle, Jan. 23, 2001

"I do remain confident in Linda. She'll make a fine labor secretary. From what I've read in the press accounts, she's perfectly qualified."
-Austin, Texas, Jan. 8, 2001

"Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods."
-Austin, Texas, Dec. 20, 2000

"People make suggestions on what to say all the time. I'll give you an example; I don't read what's handed to me. People say, 'Here, here's your speech, or here's an idea for a speech.' They're changed. Trust me."
-Interview with the New York Times, March 15, 2000